Well, here we go. Two days in a row! I feel good about that accomplishment. Hey, it's the little things. Anyhoo, here we go.
I love what Chapter 2 reveals about the impartiality of God. Paul hits the nail on the head when he says that when we judge one another, we condemn ourselves (v. 2). So often, we do not trust God to take care of His business with other people. I know how guilty I have been of this, often times calling it accountability or "church discipline." Not that either of those things are bad in and of themselves, but it is not my job to become the Jesus Police. Just because someone is doing something that I don't think is the right thing to do, I don't have the right to assume how God is going to handle it and decide in my head and heart what kind of person that individual is.
He continues on, referring to the gap between Jews and Gentiles, but the message is applicable for us all: "You who preach that one shall not steal, do you steal? You who say that one should not commit adultery, do you commit adultery? You who abhor idols, do you rob temples? You who boast in the Law, through your breaking the Law, do you dishonor God?" (v. 21-23) The most important part of "following the Law" is to continually self-check. Ugh...no matter how long I have been fighting this, these verses are a huge slap in the face. Even today, I have definitely cast judgement on more than one individual, even though I sit here having allowed myself to become more distant with God out of sheer laziness. Bam. Conviction. Thanks, Holy Spirit.
All that to say, my concern needs to shift to the point where it is about me and Jesus...no one else. I can encourage, I can speak truth, but cannot allow myself to put myself into God's shoes in their lives.
Sidenote: One thing that I have realized in the past 24 hours is that I can easily talk about God being first in my life, but is He really? Do I genuinely love Him more than certain individuals in my life, or do I say this out of duty and habit? Just a thought.
Showing posts with label God. Show all posts
Showing posts with label God. Show all posts
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Monday, July 26, 2010
21 Day Challenge, Post 1, Romans 1
It's a fact that habits are so much more difficult to begin than to maintain. However, when life hits you like a ton of bricks, it seems like the best habits for you are the first to go. For me, reading the Bible has become this habit that I have let go to the wayside. I remember being at Starbucks every morning last year at 6:45, getting 30 minutes of reading and reflection in before work. Now I scramble out the door and allow myself to be filled with mindless activity, forgetting the passages I've previously hidden in my heart. In part, I've fought getting back into the habit due to my hatred of legalism, but most of it is just laziness. This past Sunday, Paul issued a challenge to us all to read the Bible every day for 21 days. He gave different passages for people in different walks of faith, and the one I chose is Romans. So...in order to stay accountable, I am going to try and blog about each chapter that I read...I'll summarize, reflect, and question/apply. I welcome thoughts and will do better about commenting back.
That said, let's get crackin'.
In my Bible, Chapter 1 is divided up into 2 segments: "The Gospel Exalted" (v. 1-17) and "Unbelief and its Consequences" (v. 18-32). I'm going to talk about each separately and do my best to not put my own truth into it...sigh. Harder than it seems.
Reaction to writing about Part 1:
Part one is composed of mostly introductory stuff. Paul is writing a letter to the believers in Rome. First and foremost, I've always loved Paul. He's a stud. The books of the NT that he wrote have always been my favorites...I don't know, maybe it's his unapologetic viewpoint that just resonates with me. Anyway, most of the time I skim through this part, but I made myself focus on each verse this time. One thing that I noticed is that Paul is using this opportunity to fervently encourage his fellow believers. He tells them: "unceasingly I make mention of you, always in my prayers making request...for I long to see you...that is, that I may be encouraged together with you while among you, each of us by the other's faith, both yours and mine" (v. 10-12). I love this example of Christian encouragement. Paul has been separated from this body of believers for some time, yet he maintains this relational aspect of their connection. They are not just "Christians" who are hosting a guest speaker. They truly love each other in Christ and do the best they can to meet each other's needs. I imagine Paul finally arriving to Rome and asking them "What can I do for you? How can I serve you?" and vice versa.
I also love the point of this encouragement. It is not for self-righteousness or an ego boost...it is so that the gospel is preached. Verse 16 is a widely known verse: "I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek." The love Paul expresses and receives for/from Christ is not exclusive. It is accessible to anyone! The way in which he "preaches" this in the beginning of this letter is simply by expressing his love. I love this. To quote Paul Mints, "This is a football." Going back to the basics...the love of Christ brings the free gift of salvation to any who will receive it.
This next part isn't so fun. Reaction to having to write about Part 2:
Ugh. It's so much more fun to talk about encouragement than sin. Seriously. But I am going to hash it all out and be honest about what I think and whether or not it lines up with God's word. Suck.
Paul begins talking about ungodliness and God's reaction to it. I've never really thought about it before, but this passage reeks of the consequences of free will. The people he is talking about know the truth of God...they have seen His creation, His power, etc. but are choosing to live ungodly lives, which is "suppressing the truth in unrighteousness," i.e. becoming a stumbling block for those around them seeking the truth. These are the individuals that have "exchanged the glory of the incorruptible God for an image in the form of corruptible man..." (v. 23) In this instance, Paul means a tangible idol, but I think that it can be applied to anything we place before Christ. Now, note the wording of the next verse here: the Word says "For this reason God gave them over in the lusts of their hearts..." Never does it say "smote" or "hatefully caused"...God simply allowed them to do what they wanted to do. He gave them the choice. He allowed the sin they so readily ate up to consume them. Translation in Caty-ese: Satan uses free will to lead us on the path of destruction, and God loves us enough to let us choose, even though He knows what is best. Wow, what it must be like to be God. I would be horrible at it. I'd get so annoyed with people making stupid decisions I'd just wipe them out or use some excellent mind control technique or something. Again, thank goodness we don't have any Caty Almighty stuff going on up in here.
The next part is something that I will be blogging about in a series I plan on attempting called "Taboo Topics." While Paul is talking about this refusal on God's part to turn us into robots, he specifically addresses the issue of homosexuality: "For this reason God gave them over to degrading passions; for their women exchanged the natural function for that which is unnatural, and in the same way also the men abandoned the natural function of the woman and burned in their desire toward one another, men with men committing indecent acts and receiving in their own persons the due penalty of their error" (v. 26-27). For those of you chomping at the bit, I promise I'm not stopping there and will give full attention to the context of the verses around it. But when things get right down to it, the word of God is examining the sexual relationship between members of the same sex, and is categorizing it as ungodly. I'll be honest: I HATE THIS. I hate that this is the truth that I'm finding. I have friends who are homosexual. They are wonderful people. I love them dearly. So does God. And not just in a "love them to Jesus" way..for me, there is no "us" and "them." The next few verses provide a little relief from this heart pang, and really puts a lot of the self-righteousness out there to rest.
Last few verses:
Other ungodly acts/characteristics listed in the remaining verses are as follows: unrighteousness, wickedness, greed, evil, envy, murder, strife, deceit, malice, gossiping, slander, hate, insolence, arrogance, pride, disobedience to parents, refusing to understand, untrustworthiness, unloving, unmerciful....wow. If you think for one second you haven't been on that list, get a reality check. I don't know why Paul goes into detail about homosexuality and not the other things...honestly my guess is that he wanted to be able to explain what he meant, because sexuality in and of itself is not a sin...perhaps he wanted to clarify. I don't know. Another blog, another time. But, bottom line, sin is sin. It's all bad. It's all consuming. There is no sin that is only "kind of ungodly." Anyway, what we end with here at the end of chapter 1 is the process of being encouraged, followed shortly by a brutal beating in which we realize that we are irrevocably screwed up and that we did it to ourselves. Awesome.
I hate ending with that, but I am not going to skip ahead. I will be writing some thoughts about Chapter 2 tomorrow. Please join me in this challenge! It's not too late!
Peace.
-Caty
That said, let's get crackin'.
In my Bible, Chapter 1 is divided up into 2 segments: "The Gospel Exalted" (v. 1-17) and "Unbelief and its Consequences" (v. 18-32). I'm going to talk about each separately and do my best to not put my own truth into it...sigh. Harder than it seems.
Reaction to writing about Part 1:
Part one is composed of mostly introductory stuff. Paul is writing a letter to the believers in Rome. First and foremost, I've always loved Paul. He's a stud. The books of the NT that he wrote have always been my favorites...I don't know, maybe it's his unapologetic viewpoint that just resonates with me. Anyway, most of the time I skim through this part, but I made myself focus on each verse this time. One thing that I noticed is that Paul is using this opportunity to fervently encourage his fellow believers. He tells them: "unceasingly I make mention of you, always in my prayers making request...for I long to see you...that is, that I may be encouraged together with you while among you, each of us by the other's faith, both yours and mine" (v. 10-12). I love this example of Christian encouragement. Paul has been separated from this body of believers for some time, yet he maintains this relational aspect of their connection. They are not just "Christians" who are hosting a guest speaker. They truly love each other in Christ and do the best they can to meet each other's needs. I imagine Paul finally arriving to Rome and asking them "What can I do for you? How can I serve you?" and vice versa.
I also love the point of this encouragement. It is not for self-righteousness or an ego boost...it is so that the gospel is preached. Verse 16 is a widely known verse: "I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek." The love Paul expresses and receives for/from Christ is not exclusive. It is accessible to anyone! The way in which he "preaches" this in the beginning of this letter is simply by expressing his love. I love this. To quote Paul Mints, "This is a football." Going back to the basics...the love of Christ brings the free gift of salvation to any who will receive it.
This next part isn't so fun. Reaction to having to write about Part 2:
Ugh. It's so much more fun to talk about encouragement than sin. Seriously. But I am going to hash it all out and be honest about what I think and whether or not it lines up with God's word. Suck.
Paul begins talking about ungodliness and God's reaction to it. I've never really thought about it before, but this passage reeks of the consequences of free will. The people he is talking about know the truth of God...they have seen His creation, His power, etc. but are choosing to live ungodly lives, which is "suppressing the truth in unrighteousness," i.e. becoming a stumbling block for those around them seeking the truth. These are the individuals that have "exchanged the glory of the incorruptible God for an image in the form of corruptible man..." (v. 23) In this instance, Paul means a tangible idol, but I think that it can be applied to anything we place before Christ. Now, note the wording of the next verse here: the Word says "For this reason God gave them over in the lusts of their hearts..." Never does it say "smote" or "hatefully caused"...God simply allowed them to do what they wanted to do. He gave them the choice. He allowed the sin they so readily ate up to consume them. Translation in Caty-ese: Satan uses free will to lead us on the path of destruction, and God loves us enough to let us choose, even though He knows what is best. Wow, what it must be like to be God. I would be horrible at it. I'd get so annoyed with people making stupid decisions I'd just wipe them out or use some excellent mind control technique or something. Again, thank goodness we don't have any Caty Almighty stuff going on up in here.
The next part is something that I will be blogging about in a series I plan on attempting called "Taboo Topics." While Paul is talking about this refusal on God's part to turn us into robots, he specifically addresses the issue of homosexuality: "For this reason God gave them over to degrading passions; for their women exchanged the natural function for that which is unnatural, and in the same way also the men abandoned the natural function of the woman and burned in their desire toward one another, men with men committing indecent acts and receiving in their own persons the due penalty of their error" (v. 26-27). For those of you chomping at the bit, I promise I'm not stopping there and will give full attention to the context of the verses around it. But when things get right down to it, the word of God is examining the sexual relationship between members of the same sex, and is categorizing it as ungodly. I'll be honest: I HATE THIS. I hate that this is the truth that I'm finding. I have friends who are homosexual. They are wonderful people. I love them dearly. So does God. And not just in a "love them to Jesus" way..for me, there is no "us" and "them." The next few verses provide a little relief from this heart pang, and really puts a lot of the self-righteousness out there to rest.
Last few verses:
Other ungodly acts/characteristics listed in the remaining verses are as follows: unrighteousness, wickedness, greed, evil, envy, murder, strife, deceit, malice, gossiping, slander, hate, insolence, arrogance, pride, disobedience to parents, refusing to understand, untrustworthiness, unloving, unmerciful....wow. If you think for one second you haven't been on that list, get a reality check. I don't know why Paul goes into detail about homosexuality and not the other things...honestly my guess is that he wanted to be able to explain what he meant, because sexuality in and of itself is not a sin...perhaps he wanted to clarify. I don't know. Another blog, another time. But, bottom line, sin is sin. It's all bad. It's all consuming. There is no sin that is only "kind of ungodly." Anyway, what we end with here at the end of chapter 1 is the process of being encouraged, followed shortly by a brutal beating in which we realize that we are irrevocably screwed up and that we did it to ourselves. Awesome.
I hate ending with that, but I am not going to skip ahead. I will be writing some thoughts about Chapter 2 tomorrow. Please join me in this challenge! It's not too late!
Peace.
-Caty
Friday, May 30, 2008
Chiseled Concrete
I haven't written anything spiritual in a while, so I think it's about that time. lol. I guess a reason for that is because, to be frank, I don't have much to write about. But what occurred last night was significant. Think in metaphors with me for a second. If the wall between God and I is made of concrete, don't consider this breakthrough a wrecking ball...consider it a tiny chiseled hole through which a tiny stream of water is jetting through. The great thing about this, though, is that one small crack spreads like wildfire. So you see why I am excited.
Growing up, I thought a LOT with my heart. I went on feeling, emotion, gut instinct. Every decision I made was through this, as was my relationship with God. I didn't know a lot theologically, but felt very intimate with God. This continued until sophomore year, which I see as my "End of Innocence" time of my life. That year was a lot of things, but none of them were pleasant. I experienced a silence from God like I had never known...and I didn't handle it with grace. There was a lot of Bible throwing, emotional outbursts in my room, etc. But I think what I pinpoint as the turning point was when my heart was broken and I became disillusioned with trust and blind faith, and began to think with my head.
Now, hear me out, I am not saying this is a bad thing. I think that we are created to be lifelong learners, and that God wants us to educate ourselves about Him and His creation as much as possible. But when your logic and intellect separate from your heart, you are in a world of trouble. Now around January I began to realize this about myself. My head was so disconnected from my heart that I just really didn't feel anything anymore...no hurt, no joy, no nothing. Just cynicism. I have tried to work on this, but it seems that I just can't feel God's intimacy when I read His word.
I have been reading the book Crazy Love by Francis Chan, trying to see if there is anything that could help me in there. And indeed there was. Chan mentions the verse in Deuteronomy where it commands us to "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind." See? These things are all interconnected! I can't just love God with my heart, nor just with my mind. It all has to mix, and then and only then will intimacy be had. Now, knowing this and changing my ways are two different things. But, it is a starting point. I don't want to be cynical. I don't want to pour out empty worship on the altar. I want to feel something...anything. Dangerous prayer, I know.
This is my spiritual crack for the month of May. Hopefully, more cracks to come.
Growing up, I thought a LOT with my heart. I went on feeling, emotion, gut instinct. Every decision I made was through this, as was my relationship with God. I didn't know a lot theologically, but felt very intimate with God. This continued until sophomore year, which I see as my "End of Innocence" time of my life. That year was a lot of things, but none of them were pleasant. I experienced a silence from God like I had never known...and I didn't handle it with grace. There was a lot of Bible throwing, emotional outbursts in my room, etc. But I think what I pinpoint as the turning point was when my heart was broken and I became disillusioned with trust and blind faith, and began to think with my head.
Now, hear me out, I am not saying this is a bad thing. I think that we are created to be lifelong learners, and that God wants us to educate ourselves about Him and His creation as much as possible. But when your logic and intellect separate from your heart, you are in a world of trouble. Now around January I began to realize this about myself. My head was so disconnected from my heart that I just really didn't feel anything anymore...no hurt, no joy, no nothing. Just cynicism. I have tried to work on this, but it seems that I just can't feel God's intimacy when I read His word.
I have been reading the book Crazy Love by Francis Chan, trying to see if there is anything that could help me in there. And indeed there was. Chan mentions the verse in Deuteronomy where it commands us to "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind." See? These things are all interconnected! I can't just love God with my heart, nor just with my mind. It all has to mix, and then and only then will intimacy be had. Now, knowing this and changing my ways are two different things. But, it is a starting point. I don't want to be cynical. I don't want to pour out empty worship on the altar. I want to feel something...anything. Dangerous prayer, I know.
This is my spiritual crack for the month of May. Hopefully, more cracks to come.
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Song of Questions
I had a Harry Potter-esque moment today during class. As I was grading papers, my "scar" of writing urge started to "tingle". I had to wait until the bell rang, all the while, the tingling turning into a burning, until finally I broke open my journal and wrote this song down. It honestly might be terrible...but I had to write it.
Verse 1:
Don't want to feel
Don't want to listen
Don't want to cry
Don't want to pitch in
Don't want to pray
Is that okay?
Do You still love me?
Can't understand
Can't sing Your praises
Can't figure out
Can't seem to escape this
Can't smile today
Is that okay?
Do You still love me?
Chorus:
You will, and You can
and You have a plan for me
You were, and You are
all that You said You would be
You say trust You, and know
that You won't let me go
Cause You were, You are, I AM
Verse 2:
Just want to breathe
Just want to break through
Just want to laugh
Just want to hear You
Just want one day
To know I'm okay
And feel that You love me
Might have to try
Might need to trust You
Might have to speak
Might try to make do
Might see through the grey
Find out I'm okay
And know that You love me
Verse 1:
Don't want to feel
Don't want to listen
Don't want to cry
Don't want to pitch in
Don't want to pray
Is that okay?
Do You still love me?
Can't understand
Can't sing Your praises
Can't figure out
Can't seem to escape this
Can't smile today
Is that okay?
Do You still love me?
Chorus:
You will, and You can
and You have a plan for me
You were, and You are
all that You said You would be
You say trust You, and know
that You won't let me go
Cause You were, You are, I AM
Verse 2:
Just want to breathe
Just want to break through
Just want to laugh
Just want to hear You
Just want one day
To know I'm okay
And feel that You love me
Might have to try
Might need to trust You
Might have to speak
Might try to make do
Might see through the grey
Find out I'm okay
And know that You love me
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