The "Three Date Curse"

It has been brought to my attention that, when it comes to going on dates, I have a "thing," a quirk that presents itself subtly but surely into my relationships, no matter how casual or serious they are. I have dubbed this little jewel the Three Date Curse. Allow me to rewind a little bit and explain the TDC's origin.

In 2007, I helped out with a Disciple Now weekend in Port Aransas, where my friend Zac was serving as youth minister. One of my favorite Rho Beaus, Josh Myers, was helping out as well. Josh is one of those guys that will have your sides hurting within 5 minutes of talking to him. Quite enjoyable. But, at the time, the boy had been out of college for 3 years and had yet to really date a girl. I didn't get it. I asked him about it and he told me that he had gone on several first dates that went really well, second dates that had been fun, but by the third date, something shifted and he was suddenly bored and uninterested. I don't really know why I remember that, but I am fairly sure that I told him he was ridiculous. He's married now, so I can throw him under the bus all I want. :)

The Three Date Curse is exactly what Josh described to me, and is now haunting my social life. The first dates are usually awesome, second dates are fun, third date I'm done. Here's a look into my brain:
Date #1: Oh my goodness, now this guy is funny. And cute! Funny AND cute. AND look at how he opened that door for me. Excellent. I bet he will age really well, our children will look very nice with his genetics, and he's involved in church. Should I start looking at venues?
Date #2: Well, since Date #1 went so well, this is just one step closer to being able to change my Facebook status. Oh, look how he's trying to impress me. That's kind of cute. Or kind of not....just be yourself, dude. Ok, put your hand out during the movie in case he wants to hold it. No, wait. Do I want him to hold it? Yes...No...Yes...crap. No, I didn't say anything...more popcorn?
Date #3: Hmmm...I have got so much to do when I get home. Fold laundry, watch Biggest Loser on DVR, organize my hair products...I wonder if he knows that I am bored. If he likes me so much then why doesn't he just say so? Or do something? I can't handle that he likes me more than I like him. It freaks me out. I can't believe I am missing the Mavs game to sit here and smile and nod and say the same things I have said on #1 and #2. This is how the rest of our lives would be. Oh, dear Lord. get me out of here.

And, with that, the relationship with the unsuspecting XY chromosome has come to an end.

I really never mean to be that way...it just happens. And reflecting back on relationships that have lasted longer, I still can pinpoint the 3rd date as the turning point in which I was kind of over it, but just didn't want to hurt feelings. I wonder what happens between 1 and 3 that so drastically changes my mind. Maybe God has installed a kind of "He's not the one" filter into my brain and a switch goes off that makes me shut down. Or maybe I just date boring people. No offense if you are one of them, really it's not you, it's me.

I have been brainstorming ideas of how to break the Three Date Curse. Never date? Date more often? Assume I am nutso and just go on Date 4? I don't really know. Perhaps I will make a suggestion box and ask for helpful questions or comments. Or maybe I should just accept the fact that, in this one area, I am high maintenance and that maybe some day a guy will be great enough to break the curse. When I put it like that, it seems more of a fairy tale and less of a cause for medication. :)